MythOff Aquincum: Back to the Classics

We have not had a MythOff since February, due to the coronavirus crisis. Hence, when the Aquincum Museum invited us to bring MythOff to the museum's open archaeological park, we were more than happy to oblige. Last weekend was their Roman Festival, and we didn't only prepare with Greek and Roman mythology - but we even dressed for the occasion!

MythOff took place in the afternoon (following right after the gladiator combat). Since it was very hot outside, we abandoned the open air theater and set up under a large tree so that our audience could sit in the share. It turned out to be a great idea: it created a lovely atmosphere, and about 50-60 people stuck around to listen to myths for two hours. Voting was done by dropping pieces of pottery into urns, and the prizes were antefix replicas provided by the museum.

Here is how things went down: 

Round one: Life and death

The lineup opened with Hajós Erika. She told the myth of King Erysichthon, who disrespected the goddess Demeter, and was punished by eternal hunger. The other myth was that of Aeneas' journey into the Underworld, told by Gregus László.

Voting question: Which one would you rather take on: eternal hunger, or a trip into the Underworld?

Winner: Aeneas. People would rather go to the Underworld than go hungry.

Round two: Love

This was my round, and I got to tell a brand new myth from my repertoire: that of Dea Muta, the silent goddess, who saved a nymph from being raped by Jupiter, and then became the secret lover of Mercury. Nagy Enikő told the lovely story of Philemon and Baucis wishing to leave the world in their old age together.

Voting question: Which love would you rather choose, one that is rich but has to be kept a secret, or one that is poor but you don't have to hide?

Winner: Philemon and Baucis. People would rather not hide their love. 

Round three: Troy

Stenszky Cecília told the myth of Philoktetes, the unlucky archer whose story kicks of the fall of Troy. Dala Dániel joined her with the prequel to the prequel: the death of Heracles (a story which is depicted in a mosaic in Aquincum). 

Voting question: Who would you rather have as an archery master?

Winner: Heracles. More people would rather have an angry master than a stinky one.

It was amazing to tell ancient myths among the ancient ruins. We hope to do it again sometime soon!

MythOff Budapest: Love is blind

On February 12th, two days before Valentine's Day, we had the first Mythoff Budapest of the year! Accordingly, the theme was love, and since love myths are easier to find from all over the world, we all drew out mythologies from a hat. Hence the title of the event: Love is blind.

This time we planned for a longer session: instead of six, we had eight tellers and four rounds. Our emcee was Nagy Enikő, with Klitsie-Szabad Bogi as her second-in-command since tonight both of them were also among the tellers. The prizes, obviously, were Valentine's themed, courtesy of Bogi.

Here is the rundown:

Round one: What would you do for love?

The evening opened with Varga-Fogarasi Szilvia telling a story from the Finnish Kalevala, about Ilmarinen the Blacksmith fulfilling various impossible tasks to win his bride (including descending into the Underworld). I was the other half of the team; I chose the story of Wild Dumrul from the Oguz Turkish Book of Dede Korkut. Dede Korkut was one of the favorite epics of my late beloved storytelling mentor, Cathryn Fairlee, so when I drew Central Asia, I chose to tell from it in her memory. Wild Dumrul battles the angel of Death in this story, and his and his wife's enduring love defeats the angel in the end.
Voting question: What would you rather do for your beloved? Descend into the Underworld, or wrestle the Angel of Death?
Winner: Angel of Death (our audience was fearless)

Round two: Toxic love

This round had myths were someone got the wrong idea about what love was supposed to look like. In the Roman corner Hajós Erika told the story of Io from Ovid, where Jupiter was being a rapey jerk. Also in this round we had a new addition to our MythOff team, Dala Dániel, who told the Chinese story of Meng Jiang, whose husband was built into the Great Wall by the Yellow Emperor, who then wanted to marry the widow by force. Our new teller was eloquent and enthusiastic, and we are happy he joined us!
Voting question: If you could save one girl from her dark destiny, which one would you rather save?
Winner: The majority wished for a happy ending for Meng Jiang.

Round three: Oceans of love


This round had myths where love intertwined with the element of water. Nagy Enikő told a story from Tuamotu, where a woman named Hina swam across to another island in search of her true love, aided (or abandoned) by various sea animals. Stenszky Cecília told the Japanese origin myth of emperors, where a legendary hunter descended to the bottom of the ocean, and married the daughter of the Dragon King.
Voting Question: Which journey would you rather take on for your beloved? Swim across the ocean, or under it?
Winner: Most people preferred to swim horizontally like Hina did

Round four: From death comes love

We had two myths this evening where love was born beyond death. One came from the Mayan Popol Vuh, told by Klitsie-Szabad Bogi with great respect and eloquence. The other was the Egyptian myth of Isis and Osiris, as told by Gregus László. This round was the perfect closing for the evening: not even death can defeat love.
Voting question: If you had to pick a name to add to the official list of baby names, which would you rather pick, Horus or Jaguar Deer?
Winner: Jaguar Deer

You can follow more MythOff news on Facebook! See you at the next event!

MythOff Budapest: Bestiary

Fall is here, and it was time to have another MythOff in Budapest! We met at our usual place, the Premier Kultcafé, to tell myths to adults (although this time we also had three very attentive children, under parental supervision). The evening was themed Bestiary, and we all brought stories that involved legendary animals and mythical creatures. It seemed to be a popular idea: we had more than seventy people in the audience!
The emcee of the evening was Nagy Enikő, who made sure everything went smoothly and well. Here is the rundown:

Round one: Beasts in the family
This round featured myths where the creatures formed a part of the family. Varga-Fogarasi Szilvia told the story of Greek creation, from Chaos to the rise of the Olympians. Hajós Erika told a melancholy Japanese story about a kitsune and her love for a moral man. 
Voting question: Which myth would you name your music band after?
Winner: Japanese mythology, and a theoretical punk band named Fox Fur Smell

Round two: Female beasts
This round had two myths were women turned into mythical creatures - and both of them from Greek mythology. Klitsie-Szabad Boglárka brought us the story of Medusa with wit and humor, while Bumberák Maja told the lyrical, touching story of Arachne. They made a great pair.
Voting question: Which would you rather take on, fighting Medusa or competing with Athena?
Winner: Everyone would rather fight Medusa (go figure)

Round three: Beasts in the wild
This last round had myths where people crossed over into the wilderness. First I told the myth of the Boongurunguru, Umaroa's mythical boar, from the Solomon Islands (one of my favorite mythical creatures!). Next, Stenszky Cecília told a Khanty story about a woman who died in the woods and was reborn as a bear, raised by a bear family.
Voting question: What would you rather plant in your garden, Knathy pines of ferns growing on the back of the Boongurunguru?
Winner: Solomon Islands

The tellers of the winning myths received coffee cups painted with mythical creatures (courtesy of Enikő) - the fourth mug was raffled off to the audience. The evening went great, and we are already preparing for the next one: telling love myths for Valentine's Day!

MythOff Budapest: Living Planet

This Wednesday we had the ninth MythOff event in Budapest - for the second time in our wonderful new venue, the Premier Kultcafé. The theme, courtesy of Bumberák Maja, was Living Planet - we told myths about the relationship between humans and nature, which held important relevance to current world events. Despite it being the middle of summer, we had a great audience and a full house of more than ninety people! The emcee was Nagy Enikő, who did a wonderful job. She did not only print us voting forms in advance, but also sewed cloth baggies as prizes for Plastic-Free July, and even made sure we raffled one off to the audience.

This is how things went down:

Round one: Sacred plants

Hajós Erika told the Greek myth of King Erysichthon, who cut down Demeter's sacred grove, and the goddess punished him with eternal hunger. Eventually, the king devoured himself. Klitsie-Szabad Boglárka, told another Greek myth, that of Daphne and Apollo. Erika's telling was dramatic, while Bogi's was humorous, and the two went great together.
Voting question: Which tree would you plant in your garden, oak or laurel?
The winner: Laurel!

Round two: Sea and animals

I began this round with a story from Oceania about how the women saved Guam from a giant fish sent by the angered spirits of nature (I love this one a lot, especially because women use their hair to weave a net together). My partner Bumberák Maja told the Inuit myth of Sedna, Mother of the Sea, whose hair gets dirty and matter, and traps sea animals until someone combs them out.
Voting question: Whose hair would you rather comb, your own (heroically cut), or Sedna's?
The winner: Sedna!

Round three: Fertile land

This round focused on life, renewal, and fertility. Stenszky Cecília told us about Ishtar, goddess off fertility descending into the Underworld (she, just as Maja, used a drum for telling). Gregus László told a Tahiti myth about the God of the Sea destroying all land to punish over-eager fishermen - all land except one island where his mortal lover lived.
Voting question: With whom would you rather go out for a coffee, Ishtar or the Tahitian princess?
The winner: Ishtar!

All three votes were close, which means that we all brought good stories to the performance. Sine counting ninety-something (!) votes took a bit of time, we told some more stories in the meantime - I told about Saint Peter and global warming, and Maja told about Saint Peter and rainfall.

It was, once again, an amazing experience to tell together, and have such an enthusiastic and dedicated audience. I'm looking forward to the next occasion! For more info, follow MythOff on Facebook!

MythOff Athens: Mythical Firsts

The theme for this year's World Storytelling Day was "Myths, legends, and epics" - and it seemed like a perfect opportunity to organize a MythOff! With the support of the Federation for European Storytelling, six international storytellers and three artists banded together to bring my favorite myth-telling event to a new country: Greece! You can't even wish for a better setting to tell some myths.

Interestingly enough, we found out, Greek audiences are not usually that much into mythology. Mostly because the Greek myths are commonly known and taught, most Greek storytellers tend to select less often told stories. We had no idea, while working on the event, if anyone was going to show up at all, and if they did, how they would like the show.

In the end, we had almost seventy people in the audience, and an amazing storytelling evening to remember.

The MythOff took place in the Museum of Cycladic Art (one of my favorite museums in Athens), in one of their spacious presentation rooms. At the front of the room, behind the stage area, there was a long table where our artists were seated. That's right! For the firs time in MythOff history, we had artists creating illustrations for the myths, real time, while we were telling! Each story got its own picture, and the storytellers got to take them home. I'm still reeling from the awesomeness.
The voting happened at the end of the evening, with the use of small white pebbles. People dropped them in the vessels marked by the artists, to pick their stories, and placed them next to the pictures, to select their favorites. The artists insisted on being a part of the competition, but the choice, frankly, was near impossible.

An now, for the play-by-play:

Round One: Fire Thieves

I was lucky to be the first teller of the evening. I told the Abkhaz Nart saga of How Sasruquo Plucked Down a Star (and then acquired fire by tricking a terrifying giant). It is a great tale of a bullied hero, a powerful mother-goddess, and lots of funny shenanigans. To match all that, Vasileia Vaxevani told the Greek myth of Prometheus with equal humor and drama. Even Herakles made an appearance at the end.
Voting question: If you wanted to have a cigarette, and had to ask for fire, whom would you rather ask for it?
The winner: Prometheus!
The pictures: Ironically, the Fire round had watercolor pictures, and the Sea round had charcoal. Out illustrations were created by the incredible Yannis (John) Rubus (you can find his art page here), who didn't only draw incredible scenes for both myths, but also received the winner's crown (or rather, souvenir hairband) for the best art.

Round Two: Women

Since it is directly attached to the Prometheus myth, we got to hear the story of Pandora next, told by Maria Terzaki with great eloquence, and subtle hints at how many different ways that story can be understood. The other half of the duo was Mattia Di Pierro from Italy, who told the creation story of Lilith and Eve, and managed to surprise us more than once.
Voting question: If you had to ask for help creating something (or someone), whom would you rather ask?
The winner: Pandora! (or rather, her creation team)
The pictures: It is only fair that myths about women were illustrated by a woman, the wonderful Eugenia Koumaki.

Round Three: The Sea

The first storyteller of the last round, Torgrim Mellim Stene, arrived from Norway, and brought with him a story from Greenland. The story of Sedna tells about a girl who marries a sea bird, but her father tears her away from him. In the enduing battle, she is thrown into the sea with her fingers cut off, and thus becomes the mother of all three creatures, and the goddess of the waters. This story was matched by Ifigenia Kakridoni, who told the bittersweet Greek myth of Scylla and Glaukos, with a guest appearance from Circe. It seemed that the audience was less familiar with this than the other Greek stories, and they sounded both surprised and delighted.
Voting question: If you had to get a makeover, which transformation would you rather choose?
The winner: Sedna!

The pictures: This round was illustrated by Dimitrios Kasdaglis. For the last story, he set up a flip chart and we all got to watch him work onthe figure of Glaukos while listening to the myth. It was enchanting. 

The whole evening went great, and people seemed to have lots of fun both with the stories and with the setup of MythOff. They were already talking about having another one while we were counting the votes! We celebrated the event with dinner and drinks, showing off the artwork to each other and to the Internet (I already have mine framed). I am sure this was not the last time MythOff came to Athens. I can't wait to see what happens next!

MythOff Budapest: Myths from five continents

2019 is off to a great start: We just had the 8th MythOff in Hungary! We did not only have a new storyteller, but also a brand new, very nice and supportive venue. If everything goes well, we might have found a permanent home.

For this very first MythOff of the year, each storyteller drew a culture or region from a hat, and they had to pick their myth accordingly. Since we accidentally had tellers for five continents, we decided to make that the theme of the evening. Even though one of our seven tellers cancelled last minute due to illness (and thus we lost Africa), we still had a pretty great lineup.
This is how it went down:

Round one: Family and Conflict
This round featured two myths about conflict in the families of deities. Hajós Erika told the Japanese story of Izanagi and Izanami, the former's trip to the underworld to get his wife back - and his escape from being pursued by the armies of the dead. Gregus László told the Irish myth of Balor of the Evil Eye being defeated by his own divine grandson, Lugh.
Voting question: If you needed help protecting your loved ones and your home, whom would you rather ask for that help?
The winner: Most people thought Lugh would be the more powerful ally.

Round two: Life and Death
We did not only have two great stories in this round, but also a new storyteller! Szabad Boglárka joined us for the first time, and told the Mesopotamian myth of Nergal and Ereshkigal with passion and a great sense of humor. Stenszky Cecília brought another, more lyrical love story about how Savitri won her husband back from Yama, the Hindu god of death.
Voting question: If you had to get a loved one back from the Underworld, which deity do you think would be easier to convince?
The winner: Most people thought they would have an easier time convincing Ereshkigal.

Round three: Water and Eels
Originally, it was just gonna be Water, but then we discovered that both our stories featured eels, and we ran with it. My own choice was a Venezuelan story about how the electric eel rebelled against Napa, the Creator, and how the war of the animals led to the creation of humans. My partner, Nagy Enikő, told the Samoan legend of Sina and Tuna, and how the first coconuts were created from the head of a love struck eel.
Voting question: If you were a female eel, which eel would you rather choose as a mate?
The winner: The electric eel is sexier.

The winners of each round received a small stress ball, painted as the globe with all its countries. The fourth, remaining ball went to the youngest member of our audience (12 years old), because we thought it was super cool that he convinced his parents to bring him to an adult myth event. You can't start early enough.

MythOff Steampunk: Full steam ahead!

It's summer, and that means it was high time for another MythOff in Hungary! On June 21st, the day of the summer solstice, we gathered once again to share some myths with the people of Budapest.

Once again, we had a new venue: A stemapunk pub named Krak'n Town. We reserved their large basement space, but unforeseen circumstances in the last minute pushed us into a smaller room. We made the most of the changes: Almost seventy people crammed into the bar, cheerfully making space for each other to listen to stories together!
Since the venue was a steampunk bar, we decided to give a nod to the theme in our event. I emceed the evening in a steampunk outfit I assembled years ago, and was happy to dust off again. After each round of storytelling, the audience got a question to vote on, and they could do so by dropping mechanical parts into two jars labeled with the myths. The questions were created by our special guest, Cathryn Fairlee. The teller of the winning myth each round received a small steampunk dragon; I created those myself, using polymer clay and the parts of three old Soviet alarm clocks. It had been quite an adventure, picking those apart, by the way. It took an entire afternoon, and some of the bastards were still ticking when I had them totally gutted.

And now, for the lineup:

Round one: Time travel! People, objects, changing of eras

The evening opened with Varga-Fogarasi Szilvia telling a myth from the Solomon Islands, about how the appearance of white people, and their missionary work, angered the ocean gods, and caused the 1932 earthquake and tsunami. She even brought the anthropology book that contained a picture of the original storyteller, and his drawings of other similar myths.

I also told in this round. I decided to bring the Revolt of the Utensils from the Moche culture - a story that has been reconstructed from vase paintings, murals, and contemporary local folklore. The story tells about how people treated their utensils and domestic animals badly, and therefore they revolted with the help of the Earth Mother at the time of an eclipse, and slaughtered people until the Sun ended the rebellion. It is a really fun story, and I loved working on piecing it together from various articles.
Voting question: What would be the more fitting punishment for humanity's sins? An eternal solar eclipse, or an eternal earthquake?
The audience's decision: They decided solar eclipse would be much worse.

Round two: Blacksmiths! 

This round featured two storytellers who usually perform together; both of them brought myths about blacksmiths and metal-workers. Hajós Erika told the Irish legend of how Cú Chulainn got his name, and his weapons, after slaughtering the giant guard-hound of the blacksmith Chulainn, and taking its place.

Gergus László brought us the Norse myth of Loki cutting Sif's golden hair, and then making the Dwarves replace it, along with other famous treasures of the gods (including Thor's hammer Mjöllnir).
Voting question: If you had to face down Cú Chulainn in his war frenzy, or Thor when he is pissed off, which one of them would you rather fight?
The audience's decision: Most people wanted to fight Thor

After the second round we had our special quest, my dear epic-telling mentor Cathryn Fairlee from the USA. She told us the story of how the Norse goddess Freya got her famous necklace, the Brisingamen. She told the myth in first person, with lots of humor and great body language; even though she told in English, the entire audience was with her all the way, laughing and cheering. We could not have wished for a better welcome for our guest!

Round three: The beginning and the end 

Not necessarily in that order. Stenszky Cecília opened the round with the epic of Gilgamesh - or rather, the part of it where Gilgamesh descends into the Underworld to find immortality. She told the story wrapped in animal skins and with her hair loose; she told us about gemstone forests, underworld boat rides, and Siduri, goddess of beer and tavern-keeper of the afterlife.

The evening concluded with Nagy Enikő, who brought us not one, but four Cambodian creation myths - among them, the one about churning the Milk Ocean to receive the drink of immortality. She even made sure to give nods to all six of the previous myths in her telling!
Voting question: Where would you rather go to make friends? The Underworld, or the Milk-Ocean-churning party?
The audience's decision: This one was almost a draw! We had to ask a volunteer to close his eyes, and tell us which voting jar was heavier. With a slight difference, the winner was Cambodia.

At the end of the evening, we drew names from the audience, and handed out the remaining two steampunk dragons. They deserved it: Once again, we had the best, most enthusiastic audience a storyteller could even wish for. We are looking forward to the next event!

High School Mythical

We were asked by a friend if we could take MythOff to a high school, as a gift to a mythologically inclined seventh grade class. We said yes.

MythOff is a series of live storytelling events that was invented bring mythology, told live, back to modern audiences. It is generally an adult event; we do it in pubs, and coffee houses, and other similar venues. We have never had one in a school setting before - but when we were asked, some of us could not say no.

I love telling to teenagers. They make an amazing audience. In addition, when I was their age, I was a complete mythology dork: I made lists of gods, and read Graves and Kerényi, and collected magazine articles in a binder. And that was pre-Percy Jackson. I tried to imagine how I would have reacted if real storytellers came to my school to do real mythology.

So, we went.

Round One: Tricksters and creation

All three of us picked a mythology. For round one, all three of us brought stories that involved creation, or birth, or origins... and also, completely by accident, tricksters. Varga-Fogarasi Szilvia brought the birth of Maui; Nagy Enikő the story of Sif's golden hair and Loki's bet for the forging of Mjölnir; and I brought Momus, and his critique of Greek creation. I especially had fun with the Greeks when I asked the kids how many gods live on Mount Olympus (they knew). Then I asked if someone could list them... and a girl, very proudly and confidently, listed all twelve, with some enthusiastic support from her classmates. Be still, my heart.

The voting question: We never really had a MythOff with an odd number of tellers before - but we came up with a genius solution.
First, I asked the class if they knew how the Trojan War started. A guy said that someone kidnapped someone's wife; a girl added that the wife had been given to Paris by Aphrodite. Someone else added that it was in exchange for the golden apple; and yet another person pointed out that the apple had been thrown by Eris into a wedding. After the class assembled the entire story, I produced a golden apple (I painted it gold the night before, along with half the kitchen), and the voting question: If you had to pick a roommate when you go to college, which one of the three tricksters would you want as your roommate?
Szilvi brought three cups and a box of glass pebbles. Each cup represented a mythology. Each student got one pebble, which they places in the cup of their choice, under the supervision of the two guys in the front row, who enthusiastically commented on the proceedings, and monitored the fairness of the vote. Loki won by considerable majority (with Momus second and Maui last). If they wake up one day in college with their hair cut off, I take no responsibility.

Round Two: The wrath of the gods

This round involved myths where someone pissed off a deity in some way. Szilvi brought Maui back, and told about how he stole fire from the volcano goddess Mahuika (you're welcome). Enikő brought Thor, and told the story of how he was dressed up as a bride to take Mjölnir back from the giants (and then killed them all). On my part, I told the myth of King Erysichthon, and how Demeter punished him with deadly hunger when he chopped her sacred grove down.
The voting question: If you had to give the golden apple (I made two) to a god, knowing that the other two will be angry at you, which god would you want to piss of the least?
This time, the vote was overwhelming: Demeter won it by a landslide. To be fair, we were just before lunch break, so the kids were probably really feeling the hunger...

Once again it has been proven that mythology works like a charm in high school. And that high schoolers make an awesome audience. They were attentive, appreciative, creative, they made comments and asked questions, and took the vote very, very seriously (I loved hearing them discuss their decisions in line).

Bring more storytelling to high schools!

MythOff London: Women Who Gave No F*cks

***Adult content***

It all started on Twitter. Clare Murphy shared some article about medieval women who Gave No Fucks, and we started talking about how fun a title that would be for an all-female MythOff event. We (Clare and I) had MythOffs in London, Hungary, and the USA before, but never on the same stage. It was high time to fix that.
Other storytellers immediately jumped on the idea; it didn't take long to assemble our little team of six scandalous women who were willing to give zero fucks in public. Since two of them also happened to be the hosts of Story Jam, we even found a venue at the Canada Water Theatre. Twitter dream became reality.
Since I was in the neighborhood (performing in Dublin for World Storytelling Day), I went out of my way to join in the fun.
Here is what went down.

Our evening was hosted by the marvelous Judith Faultless with great energy and enthusiasm. She did not only introduce us, but also came up with the prizes, and made sure the audience was all fired up and ready for the stories. She even brought a plastic lightsaber so that an audience member could act as a clap-o-meter: Each round was won by the story that received the loudest applause. The six tellers were split into two teams: the Burning Bushes (Clare, Debs, and Lucy), and the Mighty Muffs (Alys, Rachel, and me). Best two out of three won the evening.

Round one: Wrecking ball 

The first round featured two formidable goddesses pitted against each other. First, Clare Murphy invoked the Ugaritian goddess Anat, lover of Baal, who, once her lover had been devoured by the god of death, took it up on herself to kill, dismember, chop up, grind down, burn, and scatter Death. The story ended with the resurrection of Baal, and a very stormy sex scene. Clare carried the whole myth with such power that I did not even dare to use my camera...

From our side Rachel Rose Reid rose to the challenge. She brought the legend of Lilith from the Hebrew tradition. Lilith was Adam's first wife, created from earth like him, who invented pleasure and sex. When Adam wanted to treat her as submissive, she left him for an angel - so the whole creation had to be rebooted, and Adam got a new wife, Eve. At the end of the legend, Lilith managed to give some friendly advice to Eve as well. Rachel's telling was funny, lively, and spicy; she made fun with abandon about Adam's feeling of superiority (and the missionary position).
The prize: A plastic rabbit with a broken ear (symbol of fertility and also wrecked things)
The winner: Lilith

Round two: It's not what you have, it's how you use it

We did not plan it this way (we all picked our own myths), but the stories in round two fit together perfectly. First, Alys Torrance brought us a shift in the mood. She told us the heart-wrenching story of Demeter seeking Persephone, about grief and pain and the indifference and cruelty of the male gods, until Demeter gave up her will to go on. At this point, Baubo enters the scene. She is the strange little goddess of sexuality and dirt, with eyes for nipples and her vulva for a mouth, and she tells enough dirty jokes that Demeter finally laughs out loud. Alys' graceful and lovely telling brought us from a heavy heart all the way to storm-like laughter. There is deep wisdom in humor (and flashing people).

From the other team we had Lucy Lill, energetic and lovable, and very pregnant, telling the myth of Amaterasu, the Japanese sun-goddess. In this story, the goddess is offended by her little brother, and hides her light from the world. Ame-no-Uzume, goddess of mirth, amuses the gods by dancing a very saucy dance, showing off her boobs and butt and finally dancing around naked with a rooster in her hands, until Amaterasu peeks out to see what all the laughter is about. Lucy's telling of the story was appropriately lively, funny, and endearing, with some very groovy dance moves.
The prize: A plastic owl (because wisdom?... or maybe eyes large in surprise)
The winner: Ame-no-Uzume

Round three: When women become myth

The third and last round of the evening was the tiebreaker. First, Debs Newbold told the true story of Grace O'Malley, fearsome Irish pirate queen of the 16th century, from her wild childhood all the way to the point where, just after the birth of her son, she went on deck of her own ship, blood dripping down her leg, to help her men fight the English. The highlight of the story was the legendary meeting between Elizabeth I and Grace. Debs is a wild woman with wild hair and a wild voice, and she put all the power into the story that it required. She was fierce!

I told the last story of the evening. I spent a lot of time thinking what legend or myth I could bring from my part of the world that fit the criteria of women giving no fucks. Finally, I landed on the legend of Puskás Klári, a Transylvanian Székely woman from the 17th century. According to legend, when the Tatars attacked her village she defended the bridge across the mill stream alone, and used various household instruments to kill seven Tatar warriors (the chief among them) - before going home and giving birth to triplets. Because she did all the killing while heavily pregnant. It was great fun describing all the fight scenes with the various improvised weapons, and the banter between Klári and her opponents. Definitely a no-fucks-given story, and the audience loved it!
The prize: A Little Mix calendar (someone explained to me who they are)
The winner: Grace O'Malley

Since the Burning Bushes won two rounds out of three, they also received the team prize for the evening: A beautiful shiny red feather that promptly covered everything in glitter. But more importantly, by my count we had more than a hundred people in the audience! And a very lively, interactive, enthusiastic audience too. I'd like to thank all of them for making our evening epic.

We came, we saw, we won, we gave ZERO FUCKS. Until next time, ladies!