Storytelling Pride Day

(I totally made that up, I just needed a title)

I am the girl who lives to tell the tale.

I was a voice in the darkness

in a room filled with people and gold

(I was not trying to be mysterious. The power went out at the museum.)

I was a Renaissance lady

I was a Roman matron

I was an archer from the past that never was,

I was a sailor on a lake

I was a guitar and a song on the shore

I was a ghost by the campfire

(the boys went to the bathroom in groups for days)

I am the stuff of legends

(for K through 4 anyway)

I am the real deal

I can pull a forest up by their roots

or at least I know the guy who could

I am a wanderer

I am a magpie

I am a butterfly, and sometimes a Moth,

I am a Storyteller

by any other name

Mesemondó

Cuentacuentos

Cuentera

Narradora

I am not a Performance Artist

I definitely do not read books for children

I come from the Land of Dragon Riders

with an unrecognizable accent

(Czechoslovakia is gone, people, and Sokovia is not a country)

I am a terrible actress

but I have lived the 1001 Nights

and talked to Scheherazade in the end

(that was one fun WoD campaign)

I can quote from Gilgamesh

and sometimes from Firefly

I know what makes a lightsaber green

and I know how Anansi got a wife

I have walked the streets of Rome

I have walked the streets of Toledo

I have walked the streets of Vienna

I have not walked the streets of Johnson City because there are no sidewalks

well that’s just the USA

I know that Black Dogs don’t bite

and I know a Trickster when I see one

believe me I see many

some call them problem children

I want to see them say that to Coyote’s face

(wait, is that his f… nevermind)

I have five hours of material in my repertoire

somewhere

buried under Journey to the West, probably

I can make a teenager cry

and an adult laugh

and a child tell stories of her own

I sit on the teacher’s desk

no grading on my watch

I leave messages in library books

I turn my papers in before the deadline

I dance my shoes to pieces every contra night

I have a license to ILL

(overloaded the library system, Houston we have a problem)

I know how to hold a sword properly

I believe in Ginger World Domination

(mark feedback “Attn.: Thor”)

I have a thing for gemstones, but only the ones with stories

and read everything Mark Twain ever wrote

because Mark Twain

I believe rap is the closest thing to Homer’s Iliad

and that the answer is 42

I knew what a Kappa was before Harry Potter

and wanted to be Lucy Maud Montgomery’s Story Girl

I really did

I thought I had to be an actress for that

dammit Lucy Maud

I told stories about beer to the tech people after the children left

I told stories

in castles

at the feet of Inca gods

in the line to the face painter

in a boat

on a boat

under a boat

I know that there are hundreds of professional mermaids in the USA

and people still laugh about storytelling

yes I get paid for it

but even if I didn’t

well I do

and we all know what happened to patrons who did not pay the bard

they grew donkey ears

(kids love that they really do)

it takes an astronomer to read the stars

and a folklorist to make Aarne and Thompson roll over in their grave

and a graphic artist to paint a dragon in two minutes

and a biologist to tell me sharks have no gills

and a Scandinavian Studies major to drool all over Viking werewolves

where would I be without them

not the werewolves

the friends

duh

Wandering is not about never having a home

it is about having a home everywhere

even in Camelot

“See you on the road”